He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
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I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
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My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Do you have feelings for this penis?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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