Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize