This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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