none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ketchup is God's man juice
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize