Swine flu. Run for my life!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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