You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
my sisters under your porch take her home
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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