i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize