fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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