So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
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then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
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I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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