she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
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Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
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You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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