I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
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We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
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Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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