i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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