That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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