you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked and annoyed.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize