So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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