clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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