What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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