She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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