youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
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Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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