I CAN MOONWALK!
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
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Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
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Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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