I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize