I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
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U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
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We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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