i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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