New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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