I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
drinking out of a sandbucket again
She's the barista slut.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You ruined the universe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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