Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I need to stop coming to work sober
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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