thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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