Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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