He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize