Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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