You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize