he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
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i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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