Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
she smelled like a LAN party
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize