the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
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Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
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I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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