I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
We were destined to go to rehab together
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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