so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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