I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Randomize