You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize