All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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