I'm gonna have a badass scar
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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