what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize