his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize