Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize