That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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