you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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