Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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