i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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