i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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