Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
He did a backflip because drugs
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