dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
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